Thursday, February 24, 2011


Hey y'all. Today's topic is going to be a serious one, in light that it is National Eating Disorder Awareness week. You can learn all about it by visiting the official website here. 

Now, I have been trying to think of a way to talk about this without being offensive, since I have never personally had an eating disorder, and I didn't want to come off sounding condescending, because I really think it is important issue, and a very serious problem affecting so many beautiful people. Also, I may not have had an eating disorder, but I certainly know what it's like to look into a mirror, and want to burst into tears because I hated what I saw. Now that is something I do have experience with.

I've come a long way on my journey to liking myself for who I am, and I still have a long way to go. Every day I am learning to love the way I look, and if I want to change something, to put the effort and hard work into it, instead of insulting myself and making myself feel worthless. 

But don't let me fool you into thinking I am an expert. Far from it, as my fiance and best friend could tell you all about. I still have days when I break down, and I tell them both, "Just listen. I need to vent, and right now I don't want to hear how pretty I am, or what have you. Just let me get it out." And I do. Ellie has an easier time with it, I think, because she's a girl and understands. Shane just gets kinda frustrated, because he thinks I'm a supermodel apparently. (Please, let him go on with this way of thinking. I'm kinda fond of it... Haha) It helps me not criticize myself all the time to just have an all out vent session every few months. 

It's so easy for me to look at y'all, or my best friend and say, you're crazy, look at how gorgeous you are, stop being insecure. And it is so dang hard for me to take my own advice. I'm so hard on myself, and I hate being told "Stop being so hard on yourself". I think it's because I'm so stubborn. So that's become my mission. To stop insulting myself. That's my goal, my resolution, my whatever you want to call it. From now on, when I want to improve something, that's how I'm going to look at it.

I'm going to take a positive outlook on things, because if I force myself into the habit of thinking nicely about myself, then maybe I'll stop being mean to myself. So, here's my plan. Everyday I'm going to write something nice about myself a hang it up. I'll even take a picture of it. It may seem silly, but who knows. It'll be Katy's version of Operation Beautiful

I know this isn't directly related to eating disorders, but I think body image and self esteem are huge factors in eating disorders, so I feel it's not completely off topic.

My own personal eating disorder story was a lie. My cousin threw up in the toilet and then told my mom it was me, and that I was bulimic. My mom then confronted me, and tried to get me help (which would have been a good move, if it had been true.) and of course didn't believe me at first, and thought I was denying it. 

I was thirteen, and skinny, and my mom was super worried. And, no, my cousin wasn't bulimic and trying to cover it up. She honestly was just a jerk, and trying to get me in trouble. 

Anyways, sorry for all of the depressing stuff, but self-esteem is so important, and if knowing that I struggle with it (severely at times) helps anyone else, then it's worth putting out there. I hope everyone has a great day.

Today's note to myself. Right next to the mirror. :)


  1. great post! You are beautiful and fantastic! You need to check out -- if you haven't heard of it!

  2. Great psot!! This is really such an important issue. I have tried to leave messages like that for myself, but I can't think of anything I like enough about myself to write haha. Maybe I should ask my hubby to do it :)

  3. Um- best idea ever! I'm excited about reading more about operation beautiful! As girls, we are so damn hard on ourselves. I am too! P told me he loves my imperfections one day and I melted down hardcore. haha what was a super sweet statement turned into omggggggg why do my knees even look like that!? bah!

    I can totally relate. Love the idea of these notes! <3

    Jenn @ Peas & Crayons

  4. Great post, self-esteem/body image is a journey for me. Some days, it's great, others I struggle.
    Hah, I love the random note you wrote yourself!

  5. Love this :)
    We really are SO hard on ourselves... I know some girls who are bigger than me and I never hear them say ugh im fat or no i dont want to go there because its too fattening. I want to be that confident in myself and love me for who i am and what I look like!

  6. I think every girl can relate to this post! I remember when I was younger and I would refuse to eat until I felt faint and even then it would be a few crackers or an apple.

    We should all celebrate ourselves for who we are, but it is easier said than done.

    Great post!

  7. This is a great idea. I love this post---and it's funny at the same time as bringing a hugely important message.
    You are amazing, and I'm glad you're telling yourself that!

  8. Great post! You really are such a special and beautiful lady! I'm glad your fiance recognizes that and reminds you of it often. :)

  9. I can totally relate to this, and I have come a long way too. I am also a bride-to-be and that has been the biggest motivation for me to REALLY get fit and healthy. It is a great feeling to know that I would be happy walking down the aisle tomorrow and wouldn't have any regrets about "I should have worked out more" or "I should not have eaten that chocolate." Thanks for posting!

  10. I love that you did this post. Although not every girl has or has had an eating disorder, every girl has looked at the mirror at least one time and not liked what they saw (guys too!). This is actually something that I suffer from more than I would like, and am working on changing it daily.

    By the way, your posts are always so inspirational and I really appreciate them. xoxo

  11. Such a great post and idea. I'm hard on myself all the time too. I wish it was easier to be happy with ourselves. Looking in the mirror and being happy isn't as easy as it seems. And I definitely agree, not only girls with eating disorders go through that. Loved this post. It made me feel so much better!

  12. I just love this post. Everyones hard on themselves I'm overly hard on myself too. For instance, last night I drank 2 beers and am kicking my dehydrated self today cuz I want to run a 7 miler today. GRRR but you have to live a little. Remember life needs to be fun too and it's important to enjoy the journey. so instead of kickingmyself I'm just going to get my seven mile run in and enjoy it and move on from yesterday. It's a brand new day!!! :) love your post! What do u miss most about the states food wise? Maybe I can send u somethihng!

  13. Great post-so important to get the awareness out there!

  14. I think what makes it easier is to just work at the positivity more every day until it becomes a new habit. It sure is hard to turn off those voices though :)
    Having great friends and family helps though, doesn't it!